Thursday, May 10, 2007

Things in the last month

that have been weird for me are -
  • the constant coming out when telling people at work and the like why you have been off work. I am patient! I pause to give them a moment to work it out after I say my partner has had a baby!
  • turning up a school with Al to pick up/drop off Thomas and have people exclaim 'I didn't even notice you were pregnant' which made me realise that Thomas' 'interesting' family wasn't actually as part of the school gossip as I presumed
  • people's reactions when Thomas tells them he is a big brother. A few have tried to argue him out of it, lucky he is 8 and very sure of the way of the world through his eyes
that have been 'annoying'
  • the difficulty in finding a church in the local area that would baptise Al (because his parents are in a same-sex relationship). We live in a very diverse area with a large gay and lesbian community, but apparently the churches have not caught up/adapted. Gaye really wants to have him baptised and I have been determined to find a place for it happen, but it has been a more challenging process that I expected. I walked past one of the local churches the other morning with Thomas, Lightning and Al and saw the rector. It was all I could do not to walk up and introduce myself and the boys and say 'he is the one you said was not welcome at your church on the phone the other day' but in the interests of peace, goodwill and Thomas sense of his family I resisted. It was close thou.
  • the number of women (mothers) who have told me how lucky Gaye is to have me to 'help' her. 1. She would be fabulous no matter who she was with 2. I am actually not breast feeding and so there is no reason a bloke can't do what I do 3. Aren't I meant to be parenting?
  • the number of women (mothers) who have asked me if it is different to when I had Thomas (well duh!)
i had forgotten about small babies
  • the washing! It isn't the load of nappies each day (although many people can not believe we are using cloth and ask about the washing of them) it is all the other stuff that just seems to get completely filthy - wraps, little suits, my clothes, Gaye's clothes, Thomas' clothes (well okay mine and Thomas were anyway), sheets - his and his and ours it just goes on and on.
  • the way people come to 'visit' and sit and stay and eat biscuits and drink cups of tea that I make
  • the amount of time that can be spent cooing, gooing and gaahing over your beautiful baby and 'gawd where has the day gone'

3 comments:

Amanda said...

You express all of those things really well--i can see how you feel!
It sounds like you have a great perspective on things though, even the "weird" things. Congratulations, and i hope that these things only get easier and more entertaining as time goes on. :)

The Fonaholics said...

How and when did you go and have a baby?? Already, this pregnancy has gone just tooooo fast!! Congratulations to you Gaye and Thomas on your little bundle!! xxx
(PS my word verification is "pebub", and i bet he is!!)

Mermaidgrrrl said...

What sort of church did you want to christen him in? Little Mister is Roman Catholic and assumed that we wouldn't be able to christen Seth, but we asked at a christening we went to where we both found the brother particularly cool and he said he is more than happy to christen Seth. The brother is actually on a committee that is for integrating gays back into the church so he's the best one we could have stumbled upon! Maybe there is a similar kind of integration group for your church, which would make it easier to find someone to perform the christening. The guy who refused you is a dick anyway - they are christening the baby so it really has nothing to do with the parents anyway. Even the more conservative Xtians agree that what the parents do shouldn't affect the ability of the baby to be christened into the church. It's not their fault we're queer.