Back to work

I have so much to write about our holidays and Christmas and the new parts of my job and have about 11 drafts on the go - but no time to do it until the weekend. So just to say Happy New Year to you and those you love and looking forward to blogging again soon

Getting Organised

I am on another sorting out cycle. These come and go with me and things have sat rather still in the last 12 months or so but suddenly I feel able to move on things that have been sitting in the to do pile – perhaps it is turning 40 or that bizarre ritual of getting things done before Christmas. Maybe it is because we are moving office at work and so organisation rules the day. Most likely it is because I have sold the house I shared with my sister after Gaye and I bought this place and so – although not actually in the money yet! – have a sense of having some actual cash to do the things we have needed to do. Whatever it is in the last month between us we have:

• Organised for the builders to finish our deck this week (Gaye)
• Organised for the new doors to go in this week (Gaye)
• Organised Gaye’s brother to come and paint in January while we are away (Gaye)
• Booked our holiday (us)
• Booked a birthday party (me), made (us) and sent (me) birthday invitations
• Organised the dog for the holiday (me)
• Sorted out myself into one bank with all of Thomas’ accounts and mine streamlined – previously I had four! (me)
• Done my tax (me)
  
• Got ourselves all on one Medicare card (us)
• Put my old super into the new (and much more stable!) super of my current employer (me)
• Got my work mobile handset fixed and the simcard re done (me)
• Got the last lot of work signed off (Gaye) and forms in to Council (me)
• Got the dog final registration organised (me)
• Done a huge health insurance and Medicare claim (me)
• Ordered new lounges and chairs (Gaye)
• Ebayed the old chairs and tv cabinet (me)
• Ordered new built-ins for the bedrooms, tv cabinet and office cupboard (Gaye)
• Sent in all the documentation to GET the documentation so I can go on Al’s birth certificate (me)
• Transferred a whole lot of payments and refunds from our credit cards or individual accounts to our joint account (me)
• Organised my Dad to get the letter about his illness earlier this year so I can claim on insurance the flights we had to cancel for our delayed holiday (me)
• Transferred our photos from my work computer to our new computer (me)
• Sorted through our junk draw (me – about once a month) and our bedroom draws
• Put the old internal doors up on freecycle.

The thing about all these tasks is they have a flow on effect. They all need you to do step one and two before you can actually get to the task. Most frustrating! So I am feeling very virtuous to have done all these tasks. MOST VIRTUOUS!

I still have lots to do thou!

• veggie garden to fix
• photo albums to complete
• send in documentation once I get it to get Al’s birth certificate changed
• sort out the dumping ground that we call the attic
• do Gaye's tax
  
• ohh and get organised for Christmas…

shopping experience

Yesterday I was in town for work and I snuck in some clothes shopping.

I used to work in town and so visited the shops there regularly when (a) I was bored or (b) had time. But now days a trip 'in to town' is a irregular event and usually means a trip to a place with lots of escalators and people, sometimes with a kid in tow and usually by the third floor and the first change room I am over it already.

The other sort of clothes shopping I do falls into two categories the stores along the shopping street which is near where I live. There are lots of nice shops along there and a couple of really nice designers that I like. That shopping is usually done when I am desperate for something and they never seem to have my size or the colour that I like. The third kind of shopping is at the outlet stores for decent quality t-shirts etc. Which Gaye usually does in bulk once a season. Last years become the PJ t-shirts and then the gardening/painting gear and then off to cotton heaven.

Yesterday however I ventured - purposefully - into a designer store in the QVB building in town. On the weekend Gaye and I had seen some of this designers clothes when we had been away on Sunday and really liked the look of them.

It is worth noting at this point that I have struggled - since putting on weight in the last couple of years in particular - lately to 'find my style.' Every now and then I come across something that I like - I have a long wrap vest, a scant, a poncho and some linen things that I really love and so end up with multiple copies of - but it is rare. I like unstructured clothes, with yummy materials, largely in monochrome colours, linen and natural fabrics. I like things that are easy to look after and not to fussy in terms of ironing.

My 40th birthday is coming up - I have declared it the year of the accessory and glamour - and I want something that I feel comfy but also fabulous in to wear for that event. I also want clothes for work and casually that I feel comfy in but also stylish without being overdressed. I am not a heels girl (apart from boots). Really I want to look like Dianne Keaton always does in films...

Anyway, I was feeling particularly unstylish yesterday. I had my period my belly ached and my hair went flat. But something in me said 'do it' and so I did. I went upstairs to the cool quiet of the second floor of QVB and walked purposely into the store.

As soon as I walked in I knew I wouldn't walk out without something - there was the white shirt we had spotted on the weekend but also I felt like I had come to almost 40 and not skinny heaven. It was filled to the brim with clothes and accessories I loved. That were funky and had really clean lines. It was all layers and textures.

And then I met Liza. Liza has been working for the designer since he started up she told. She was so nice to me. And not in the nice sucky pressure way assistants often are. In an interested - lets work out what you want way. She asked me what I liked to wear, what occasion it was. She asked me how much of my body I liked to show and then she showed me some things. She was present without being pushy. She 'styled' me a couple of times - push your sleeves up with this or pop that over there etc. She understood my 'mumsie' complex right away. She told me about the designers desire that women not be having heart attacks when they get dressed in the morning. Sigh ... I had walked into heaven - all be it a rather expensive heaven...and I felt lushed.

I rang Gaye and said "oh my god I am in this shop and the clothes are fabulous but so expensive"(we are meant to be saving mind) "Don't hold back" I was told. I walked out with four beautiful things. Each one I love. Two of them I am wearing today and I feel completely fabulous ... very lush and stylish. All the (in my opinion) well dressed women at work have commented on my clothes... I am just dying to get back there...

five things about Al

that are especially cute at the moment.

1. He loves trucks, planes and lights and gestures madly with his whole arm in the direction of any that he sees or hears. This is accompanied by a "ooohh" sound and very pursed lips.

2. He walks a bit like a penguin. Arms down by his side legs quite straight head moving about

3. He can climb up the stairs on the slide at the park, turns himself around and pushes backward until he reaches the top of the slide, holds on, grins and lets go. Thrilled with his achievement and the joy of the slide

4. When he had his final jab at the doctor with me last week he didn't cry but gave the dr what we call 'the tragic look.' This look is shared with us any number of times a day and involves his eyes half closed looking through the slits at us a frown and a down turned mouth. Any perceived slight (changing his nappy, holding his arm while he gets the jab, saying 'No' about going in the cupboard) is greeted with this particular look. It is so cute some of us like to bring it on!

5. He can't say NO yet in words, but he waves his arms back and forward in a sweeping motion to indicate it very very well!

A picnic with friends

Another weekend, another lovely picnic. This time with dear friends who date back to high school in terms of me knowing them. We were celebrating their 10th anniversary of marriage. They brought together many of us who had been at their wedding, these are people I only ever see at get togethers with these friends and so plenty to chat and catch up with. We ate cheese and drank champagne and reflected on the changes that the 10 years had brought. Lovely.

Tomorrow we are driving to meet up with my family to celebrate my Mum's 65th Birthday. Thomas is so excited to see his cousins and I am so looking forward to showing off Al's new found skills and growth with my Dad especially.

oh happy day

I feel ridiculously uplifted by the election of Obama. Ridiculously hopeful. Suddenly the world seems a more friendly and open place. A place for hope, peace and real potential for change. A real first step away from fear. Silly no doubt to put all this on one man's election...

And (although this is not a driving issue for me) given he has Rudd like policies when it comes to same sex relationships (ie discrimation is not okay but neither is getting married) it is sometimes a bit dulling to think that this is as far to equality we are likely to get.

But still it is hopeful I feel cause lots and lots of people obviously felt the same as me ... time for peace and hope...

celebrating

This weekend we have been celebrating Halloween with sugar and costumes including a Halloween disco at school and a small Halloween picnic with friends on Saturday night. We had so many lollies in our house that we threw out the ones leftover from last Halloween! (Thomas really is very sensible with sugar food!). The nicest bit was the picnic - hanging out with a few friends in a local park with yummy food. So simple and easy and yet fun.

Thomas got one over me by deciding to be a pirate for both celebrations. Which meant buying a sword and a pistol (plastic ones previously not had in our home) he admitted after that was why he chose said pirate costume - clever boy!

This weekend have been celebrating Gaye's graduation from her Masters. With another - much longer but equally enjoyable picnic with friends in Centennial Park. Cricket was played, yummy food was shared and champagne drunk - clever Gaye!

Never under-estimate

I should know this by now. I have been "managing" a hormone imbalance brought on by a pituitary tumour for the last 15 years. I say "managing" because I am actually not that good at managing it. I tend to ignore it until it all gets so bad I can't ignore it anymore.

Anyway I finally did something about it -again- and what do you know the world seems a much better place!

Spy Wizard

Thomas has a problem. He can’t chose on which career to take up. Spy or wizard (or lifeguard or tri-athlete) What I really enjoy about this is he is nine (and the size of a 12 year old) but he is still fully engaged in imaginative play involving him and sometimes-small toys…

The thing is spies have gadgets…

He has been into all things spy for sometime now. He especially enjoys stories about kids who become spies and ‘save the day.’ He has been reading a series of books about a boy called Z@c Power who has joined a spy agency. In the books Zac’s code name is ‘Agent Rock Star’ and the boss is ‘Agent Big Boss’. Z@c’s brother makes the gadgets (a bit like Q in the Bond movies). The most recent series of the books (mega missions!!!) came with Z@c Power gadgets attached to carabinas – a small compass, torch and magnifying glass. Last weekend Thomas and his friend who was over to play packed up these and other spy gadgets and went ‘spying’ writing notes about what they saw and heard. They had a great time.

Anyway, clearly Thomas has been talking all things spy with his Dad too because last night at the dinner table he suddenly turned to me and said ‘hey Mum did you know that my Dad’s dad used to be the boss of the spies?

I said I did know that and that I thought that perhaps his Dad and I had been to his office once. He hammered me with questions ‘were there gadgets in his office?’ ‘how did he become the big boss?’ ’did you see any spies?’ ‘was there a room to make gadgets?’ ‘did he have a code name?’ ‘did he have guards like Mr How@rd?

My lack of knowledge did not impress him all that much (particularly my comment about working hard to become the big boss of something). But in the end he decided that his grandfather would have his gadgets hidden from (the likes of) us anyway, probably in an underground room.

Then again wizards have magic…

When he is not being a spy he is being a wizard. A couple of weeks ago when we were walking his dog he went and sat in a tree in the park (while I actually walked the dog) and he pulled out all of his ‘wizard stuff’ from his ever present small yellow and blue bag which he carries everywhere these days with whatever is important to him of the moment. After he had sat in his tree and played for awhile he and I walked around to the shops to pick up a few items. The conversation went like this “Mum you don’t believe in wizards do you?” “Sure I do honey” "No mum you don’t but that is okay because people who can’t be wizards just don’t know about it. Do you think you would be happy if I were a wizard when I grow up?”

It must be the spring before I turn 40 because

• we are eating our dinner out on the deck most nights - thou we do eat our dinner at a kid friendly time (we have always been a one meal eat all together type family rather than the kids meal followed by the grown-up meal type of family);
• my washing line is full of Al's all-in-one short and top thingos instead of little cords & cardigans;
• soccer season is over so our Saturday mornings are free of driving around this crazy city at peak weekend time finding remote soccer fields (shhh as I say a small hooray at that, thou I will miss the weekly catch-up with the team and enjoy watching the kids play);
• "nippers" season has started (and Thomas was keen to do it again for the first time in a number of years) and so our Sunday mornings now involve a trip to the beach - which is completely gorgeous;
• my oregano is 30 cms high, the newly planted basil is about 20 cms high, the tomatoes and the passion fruit are flowering and if half the limes and lemons that are budding come out we will be able to supply all our friends with fresh lemon for their summer g&t's;
• we have booked our summer holiday - four whole weeks off work for me and more than two whole weeks for us all up north in a cabin near a beach and a pool and a low-key-but-groovy-enough-to-have-good-coffee small town;
• the jacaranda are flowering outside my window at work. A view I will miss ALOT when I move to my new building in two weeks;
• Thomas has started swimming lessons again - his face when they told him he had 'finished learn-to-swim' and was 'ready for squad' was priceless and reminded me what a little boy he still is in some ways
• we are doing the picnic regularly as a socialising event. In the next few weeks we have a halloween picnic (Thomas) , a masters attainment celebration picnic (for Gaye and our friend Gary who both finished their masters this year) and a 10th wedding anniversary picnic (for two dear friends) planned;
• and that last one sort of ties into the next one cause at that wedding I was lovely and pregnant with Thomas and right now I am seriously thinking of having another baby.

First pair of big boy shoes

 

I am told that Al was so thrilled at getting his new shoes he hugged the man at DJ's who fitted him followed by walking around the store arms above his head calling 'oohh oohh' until all and sundry commented on his new shoes.

Cousin time

Thomas is having a lovely school holidays and none of it has anything to do with me. My niece is in town - after taking her first plane flight on her own to get here, and they are having a lovely time together. Beach trips and ferry rides. Later on we will probably go to Luna Park. They have always been good friends these two and really enjoy each other's company.

On Monday when we picked her up from the airport he walked her to the baggage pick up (after standing face pressed against the window as her plane came in) and insisted on carrying her bag to the car for her. So sweet.

Walking Boy

Al is walking all the time now. He only returns to his hands and knees to go up stairs or down stairs. He still insists on carrying things around in his mouth - we are a bit scared he models more on the dog than the other people - but also walks around the house 'singing' alot of the time.

The books say he should have six words by now. He has none. That is not to say he doesn't know what is going on - he certainly does. Or that he can't get what he wants - he certainly can. He has a raft of signs and grunts to inform and engage. He has started throwing the most wacking tantrums too. Fun times ahead

spring in the garden

Suddenly I turned around this week and spring has sprung. Even my chili bushes which I thought really and truly I had killed are filled with new life and leaves. Thomas, Al and I spent Sunday morning re-planting and watering and weeding. Most satisfactory. Expect tomatoes, basil, cucumber, strawberries, oh, and chili from our place very very soon.

A few fastories from this week

Thomas asked us some questions about what is was called when you said a prayer around the table before dinner. He told a story being with his Dad at the snow and doing that. (Clearly not a feature of our home!) Gaye and I launched into an explanation of 'grace' both able to fall back into our childhoods and chant grace at a moments notice. He kept telling us they weren't 'quite the right words' so we tried out a few we knew. Thomas' Dad is not a religious person and I know the people he was staying with very well and so I was a bit surprised to hear they were saying grace. Half way through the conversation I realised he was talking about the people he stayed with on the way to the snow who are also very good friends of my sister. This seemed even more unexpected. I questioned him about it 'are you sure?' at Kat and Matts? Yep he was sure. (Kat and Matt are pretty crunchy and live a very green-friendly existence he had already had my sister and I in stitches telling us that he realised he was very very 'ritch' after being at their home which is not heated very much and generally set up with lots of pre-loved stuff). After two days I was talking to my sister and mentioned the grace story. She almost wet herself laughing. Turns out they hold hands and thank mother earth for the provision of food...



Gaye and Al have been up in QLD for the week looking after a very good friend who is going through chemo. She sent me some flowers this week and they came with chocolates and a candle. On arriving home to the most lovely bunch of flowers on our doorstep Thomas exclaimed 'Look Mumma these chocolates must be for me Gaye wouldn't send you are present without sending me one"


Thomas spent father's day with his Dad which left me alone for the weekend. I decided to spend it with my best friends in Melbourne so for about 24 hours my family was spread across three states. I spent the weekend eating and drinking and laughing in the way one only can when you are with your best friends. They only moved there at the beginning of the year and I miss them all the time.

Sabotage and Subterfuge

One of the best things about working at the University is every now and then I get to pretend that I am the person I was when I was a student. Ie: A person with a lot of time. I have just spent the last 40 minutes listening to Obama speak about his hopes for his nation. I thought what he had to say was mostly fine and very American. But mostly I enjoyed the fact that I could stand in the University bar, have some lunch and watch the live CNN cross and um, call it work.

What made it feel all the more like subterfuge was that it is a gloriously sunny day and on these days I try my best to spend my lunch hour walking around campus to get a break away from the computer and stretch my legs a bit. On rainy days I head to one of the museums or art galleries we have on campus. I am trying hard to get a bit fitter (and smaller) by the time I turn 40 at the end of the year. (In fact I have said I will only celebrate my 40th if I am two sizes smaller!). So really it was sabotage as Thomas and I rode to school this morning (and right now Gaye and Al are biking over to pick him) and I have just undone that by eating a hamburger and watching Obama.

four for fathers

This week I bought four – that is right four - Father’s Day cards.

I wonder if I am the only member of a two-mother household holding up the father’s day card economy in this way. I mean we would be expected to be awash with mother’s day cards…but father’s day?

In this life of mine as a two-mother household I have moments where I feel particularly not straight and part of the general population and most of the time where I fit right in. I couldn’t work out exactly what this moment was. When I bought the cards the woman at the checkout said ‘gosh how many Dad’s do you have?’ I didn't even know how to answer.

Oh, okay I will tell you who they are for; I know you are dying to know:

• One is for Thomas’ Dad from Thomas
• One is for Thomas’ Dad from me (we always write a note thanking each other for fabulous parenting of young Thomas and wishing each other the best for the day. He usually brings me flowers too. I get him a gift. This year I am having the videos of Thomas growing up put on DVD for him. Rather nicely I think, although he is not Al’s Dad, he has addressed his card/flowers to both Gaye and I since his arrival)
• One is for my Dad – which is usually written these days by Thomas and acknowledges his roles as 'Dad' and 'Papa'.
• One is for Gaye’s Dad also to be written by Thomas this year acknowledging his roles as 'Dad' and 'Grandad' (and 'step-Grandad' for that matter). Gaye says he is going to drop over with shock as she hasn’t done this for many years but since Al’s donor is not around for cards and presents we thought it would be a good habit to start now for those school years ahead where gifts and cards will be made by small chubby hands in the week leading up to Father's Day. Al can make his for Grandad or Papa as he chooses.

And yes I did by individual ones and resisted the temptation to buy four the same...I have standards.

First word

Al spoke his first word today - ball. He did it twice in a row. (he is pretty obsessed with balls).

When my Dad rang today I told him. He reminded me that Thomas' first word was shoes (shhezz). Mainly I think because putting on ones shhoozz was something we did(do) before we went outside somewhere. I didn't have a blog then just a journal ...

Al also has developed this half closed eyes, scrunched up nose look to indicate he is not happy with some minor infraction. It is gorgeous!

Thomas and Al

One day last week Al slept until 8:40 in the morning. By 8:40 the rest of us were up and he only likes to have his boob lying down these days. So Gaye didn’t bother. He got to the end of the day and so did she (she gave up night feed about two months ago) without a lunch time snack or an afternoon lie down with some boob.

He has not shown any interest again since. And so it seems he is weened.

Yesterday Gaye ate wheat, we have a plan to go out and eat eggs together and read the weekend papers from cover to cover.

Breakfast out on a Saturday or Sunday morning was a big tradition in our week before Al. Gaye and I read the papers, Thomas talked and read kids magazines or the comics from the paper on a Sunday. Since Al it has become more difficult – especially since his allergies make it no fun for him and that we have to organise his breakfast anyway so may as well do it at home.


Thomas came back from the snow with lovely gifts – bought with his own money – for Al. And a gorgeous photo of him flying down a slope for us. He came full of stories and bruises and looked relaxed and happy. He spent Sunday in bed or on the couch watching ‘lympics.

He is full of questions I can’t answer – like how the bike races work for example. He went back to school for a whole day yesterday only to spend last night vomiting and is now at home on the couch.

Update on us

Thomas is at the snow for his now annual dose of skiing. He has two more days of skiing to go. Last night when we were talking on the phone he told me ‘it was the most wonderful day of all our days so far. There is lots of snow and the sun was shinning. It was beautiful. The coffee man (person at the coffee shop where they buy lunch each day) was jealous of us.' He has moved up to using stocks and is pretty pleased with himself. It has been impressed upon him that skiing is a real treat and an expensive holiday and so he is also very impressed with the fact that the 'teachers in the milo club' (instructors) get 'free lift tickets, free boots and skis.' He thinks it might make a good job. (hmmm) I added "in the University holidays!"

Al has been ‘walking’ in between us while we sit on different chairs for a few weeks now. I think his record would have been around 6 – 8 steps. Yesterday the babysitter said he walked between her and and the kitchen draws and took 15 steps in a row. He still doesn’t use it as a form of getting from point A – B thou, it is more like a game. His ‘vocab’ is increasing he is using lots of new sounds this week and has started to babble at us in what seem like sentences but no actual words yet. He certainly is able to communicate with us effectively with signs and grunts to get all he wants thou!

Most endearingly he has started to throw the odd tantrum. Currently this involves laying himself or his head down very carefully on the floor or the highchair table and sometimes builds up to a bit of a cry. Mainly thou it is a scrunched up face that I really hope we catch on camera at some point.

I spent last Saturday painting my house that my sister is living in and that we own together. It goes on the market next weekend. Gaye and I are busily planning how we are going to improve our place with the funds that come out of it. Mainly we will be reducing our debt levels so that we can save for things!

Gaye’s work is a bit quiet which was a blessing as her parents came into town for a few days. Al was appropriately (and thankfully) social with them and they enjoyed a trip on the harbour. Gaye and I spend as much time de-briefing about family visits as the actual visit. But I thought this was a pretty good one.

I went to some career coaching last night as I am still feeling pretty lost about where and what I should do next and this job – thou much improved – really doesn’t make my brain engage often enough. The career coach has suggested the area of ‘corporate social responsibility’ which I think sounds like a possibility…